Lies of the Enemy
Today is one of those days.
A week ago, I felt like I had everything figured out.
I had our time all scheduled out for "summer school" (we do it at home) to help my oldest with some of the skills he needs to work on.
I had my volunteer time all set up and planned out.
I had a good system going with keeping my house on track and all my laundry done.
I had a great system going with my kids, and was really working on being present and in the moment with them.
I was right smack dab where I needed to be with God...after what felt like years of the "not quite."
And then I got hit with the chickenpox (of all things), at 33 years old, after already having them as a kid.
You see, the enemy has a way of blindsiding you to try to knock you out of alignment with God.
He wants you unsteady. He wants you angry and bitter. He wants you exhausted. He wants you to doubt yourself.
Because that's when you're vulnerable to his lies.
As any mom knows, being sick and taking care of your family is hard. But being literally taken out of the picture for a week? Lets just say things were falling apart around here.
And then the whispers started. You know the ones. They said:
"Everything is a disaster and it's your fault."
"You are a terrible mother."
"Your children's struggles were caused by you."
"You are a selfish wife."
"Your business will fail because you're not there."
"Volunteering is obviously too hard for you. You can't handle it. Just quit."
"Why are you such a failure?"
"Why can't you do more and be more for the people that need you?"
"Your anxiety is just weakness."
"You're just not good enough."
Those are the weapons that the enemy uses against me. Those are the words he whispers into my ear to shake my foundation and knock me off of my sturdy footing in Christ.
I realized today that this is the same thing that always happens when I am in that sweet spot with Jesus.
When I feel closest to Him. When I am inside of His will for my life.
The enemy slithers in, poisonous snake that he is, to wound and infect...
And he does it to you too, friends.
He takes your deepest struggles and insecurities and he will use them to drive a wedge between you and your creator. He will use them to make you doubt yourself, and the person God is shaping you to be... and he does it when you are at your most vulnerable.
He hates when we're close to Jesus.
He loathes our contentment and the peace that we feel when we're walking side by side with our Father.
He is evil, and angry, and bitter, and jealous and he will use anything he can to get to you.
So I'm choosing to call him out on it.
Those words that sneak their way in are not our words.
They are not Gods words.
They are not the truth.
They are lies meant to wound you.
The enemy is scared because he KNOWS the people God is turning us into are a huge threat to him and his evil plans for this world. Every person that walks with Jesus is one less person that will be joining him in hell, and that both enrages and terrifies him.
Jesus is using all sorts of hardships and struggles to mold us to be more like Him.
And an army of Christians (see- "little Christs")... that scares the hell out of our enemy.
It's like in the movies where the kid is being bullied, and they finally decide to be brave and stand up and fight.
They walk up to the bully, and they get in their face, and the bully smiles because they know that small kid is no match for them...
But then they're both covered in shadow and you see the kids huge, muscly, intimidating best friend smirking behind both of them...daring the bully to try something.
The bully always runs away, because he is a coward.
He can only pick on those that seem smaller or weaker than him.
So try whatever you'd like. Whisper lies about us to try to knock us down. Tell us we're too small, or too weak, or too wounded...
We know the truth.
You're just a coward afraid of burning in hell all alone.
And we are NEVER alone.
Those of us that love Jesus have the biggest and most powerful best friend, a warrior the likes of which this world has never seen, standing behind us...with a big ol' smirk on His face, saying "bring it."
And one day, every knee is going to bow... Including yours.